Sunday, 18 December 2016

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - (Five Films) In A Nutshell, Vol.1

In A Nutshell is a new addition to the blog which I have done essentially to gather up clusters of movies I watch every now and again which I, frankly are films that don't require any reviewing of great substance. The films gathered here in this collection are Cyborg X, Sharkansas Women's Prison Massacre, Bigfoot Vs. Zombies, Pride And Prejudice And Zombies and Code Of Honour, all of which I watched on a series of nightshifts. Enjoy (or not)!

Despite being a low-budget film, Cyborg X is a technically competent high-concept genre movie that works well enough within it's confines. It has a decent enough cast plus there is some good make-up, stunts and action scenes. Nothing that hasn't been done better before, but does what it says on the tin.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 5.1/10

Certainly piques one's interest as far as the title and concept coming straight from bizarro world. However, despite some outrageously amusing scenes, they are stretched far and between long sequences of basil-exposition nonsense. Torn between two worlds good and bad, it learns more towards the latter.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 4.6/10

I love low-budget exploitation cinema, but this is unfortunately one of those cases of the poster being better than the film. Sure it was probably shot on a shoestring, hence the technical limitations, but that still doesn't excuse not working around them (hide the negatives, accentuate the positives), the dreadful script and terribly hammy acting. Unlike Tommy Wiseau's The Room, a genuine phenomenon, most of those films aren't so bad they're good; they're just awful.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 1.8/10

With a budget estimated at $28 million, it's the film among this present crop with the highest production value. There are things to like about it, namely the design, the mise-en-scene and a strong cast at it's centre. However, for all of it's wealth of different things to draw upon, it is largely bereft of character, and indeed rather dull.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 4.5/10

I guess it's best till last, because for all the genre sensibilities of the others and Pride And Prejudice And Zombies' $28 million high-concept premise, I chose the $8 million Steven Seagal film as the best of the bunch. I know reception has been quite sniffy to it, but I have to say I somewhat enjoyed Code Of Honor. Sure, Seagal's nonsensical monologues on the nature of justice are almost laughable, but as an b-action flick it delivers and is a relatively enjoyable watch.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 5.6/10

Well, there you have it. Kind of a lazy article on my part, but I don't that there's really much to say of any significance on these films. Not only is it a case that none of these movies are of any significance themselves, but I don't think there's anything I myself could contribute that probably hasn't been said already. I spend a fair amount of my time watching disposable nonsense, and I've spent a lot of time in the past reviewing them. With my being busy with a number of my own creative projects now, this is a way for me to sort out the wheat from the chaff, as it were (Matthew 3:12, still got it! Once a believer...). If you are going to watch any out of this bunch, watch Code Of Honor and/or Cyborg X. Both are decent enough genre flicks from which you may derive enjoyment.

Be sure to look out for upcoming reviews of the likes of Werner Herzog's Lo And Behold, Reveries Of The Connected World, Blood Father, Doctor Strange, Takashi Miike's Yakuza Apocalypse, High-Rise, Arrival and Nic Winding Refn's The Neon Demon.


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