The Thin White Dude's Reviews - Diana

Directed by: Oliver Hirschbiegel

Produced by: Robert Bernstein

Douglas Rae

Screenplay by: Stephen Jeffreys

Based on: Diana: Her Last Love by Kate Snell

Starring: Naomi Watts

Naveen Andrews

Cas Anvar

Music by: Keefus Ciancia

David Holmes

Cinematography by: Rainer Klausmann

Editing by: Hans Funck

Studio(s): Ecosse Films

Film i Vast

Filmgate Films

Le Pacte

Mahla Filmes

Scope Pictures

Distributed by: Entertainment One

Release date(s): September 5, 2013 (Premiere)

September 20, 2013 (United Kingdom)

November 1, 2013 (United States)

Running time: 113 minutes

Country: United Kingdom

Langauge: English

Production budget: (Not Available)

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $2, 230, 489 (United Kingdom only)

Alrighty then, with the rate of reviews coming in fast and furious now, this will be the last review of this bracket, and then I will be doing a summary of the month(s) of August/September much along the lines of my usual review of the month schtick. I just had to pile the two together because I saw bugger all in the month of August. I've already gotten started on October, having seen Filth on the Friday opening night (more of which in due time), so for all the latest at the movies, keep your eyes posted!

Today's film up for review is Diana, the latest in a long line of Oscar-baiting biopics about a British person. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be cynical, but The Yanks at the Academy love giving awards out to people playing famous Britons. Indeed, twice in the past three Academy Award ceremonies have acting honours went to this small group, Colin Firth of course for his brilliant performance in The King's Speech as King George VI, and Meryl Streep for playing the now well and truly deceased Mrs. Thatcher. Now, it's no secret that Diana has been savaged in the United Kingdom by the press, and not just the odd bad review, uniformly negative opinions have been shared regarding this picture. Naomi Watts herself indicated an awareness of this reception, as seen in the interview hosted by Simon Mayo, during which she was on the defensive and cut it short by two minutes. However, despite having heard these things, I think very highly of Naomi Watts as an actress, working in films such as 21 Grams, King Kong, Eastern Promises (a movie that deserves rediscovering), last year's The Impossible, and her breakthrough role in David Lynch mesmerising 2001 film Mulholland Drive. Also, the director Oliver Hirschbiegel is a talented, poised filmmaker, having made for BBC Two the Northern Ireland-set film Five Minutes Of Heaven, starring Liam Neeson and Jimmy Nesbitt, and is also responsible for Downfall, the extraordinary biopic of the last days Adolf Hitler, starring Bruno Ganz, and not only one of cinema's great biopics, but one of the best film's of the noughties. With those credentials and context sorted, lets talk synopsis: focusing on the last two years of her life following her divorce from Prince Charles, it depicts primarily the eponymous Diana falling in love with Hasnat Khan (Naveen Andrews), a heart surgeon who wishes to stay out of the limelight, and, of course, being in a relationship with one of the world's most famous people creates complications. Shall we dance?

I'll go off on a different note perhaps from the highly derisory reviews by pointing out that there are good things about Diana. There are some instances of fine cinematography by Rainer Klausmann. Having worked with Hirschbiegel before and also Fatih Akin on Head-On and The Edge Of Heaven, Klausmann brings his unique photographic style (which involves a very expressionistic form that highlights the strength of an actor's performances), and some parts of the film, particularly the opening scene following Naomi Watts' Diana from behind through various rooms, are strong. Also, Naveen Andrews pitches his performance as Hasnat Khan right down the middle, playing out the mixed emotions of the surgeon rather well. A charming and sympathetic screen presence with a wonderful delivery of lines akin to that of Jeremy Irons, Andrews also carries the weight to necessary to get across the emotional conflict of Khan, and makes for the film's best performer. The standout scene in the film is a terrific bit of work when Diana and Khan head off into the country and walk along a beach with Jacques Brel's Ne Me Quitte Pas playing over the top of it. Perhaps it isn't a good thing to say about the movie, but for the brief couple of minutes this was going on, it was a poignant little music video of two people in love, Watts and Andrews both at their best performance wise. Some of the silent montages in the film like this, and also one that reveals itself as the proverbial 'second-act dramatic tension scene' unfold rather well, and hint at the direction Hirschbiegel probably should have taken the film.

Now, as I said, the film has received more or less scathing reviews of people just savaging the movie, and while I don't feel quite as bad as some, and Diana isn't what you think of as a typical 'bad movie,' but the fact is is that it is the most generic, bland and simply dull film I have seen this year. It just plays down the line of this middle of the road picture that does not dare to do anything overly challenging with Lady Di or any of the material they had at their disposal. I mean, Hirschbiegel's Downfall had the gall, the audacity to simply look at Adolf Hitler from an objective humanistic perspective, but this is so teeky and has any/all of the edges to it sanded off. The screenplay by Stephen Jeffreys is saccharine, full of this kind of earnestness and respect for Diana that shows them as far too much in awe of the subject. Also, the dialogue is absolutely woeful, with this overtly staged dialogue that does nothing but suggest to the audience that nobody in any world or realm of the living actually talks like that. It is so artificial and clunkily-constructed that it turns the Tyrell Corporation's "More Human Than Human" slogan into "Less Human Than Human." It would be satirical and humorous if it wasn't so pathetic and disappointing at the same time. Also, the structure and arc of the plot, if I am so bold to use the word 'plot,' cops out completely on any source of tension that could be derived of Diana's relationships with Khan and Dodi Fayed. It just says essentially that Dodi Fayed was essentially just rebound off of her relationship with Khan, and you're just like "No, life is more complicated than that!" Furthermore, in the title role, much as I admire her extended work as an actress, Watts fails to convince in the lead role in the same way the likes of Colin Firth did in The King's Speech. I think that more time should have been spent on getting across the emotional drive of the character, as opposed to playing around with an accent that ultimately still sounds like a cracked Naomi Watts. She is a talented actor with all the poise and instinct for the art in the world, but she fails to truly get inside what the filmmakers' are trying to put over on the audience. The movie is also way too long at nearly two hours. If it had been about ninety to a hundred minutes, it might have been acceptable as a decent film, but it goes on and on, the scenes dragging out past their natural conclusions. I saw the film with my mum and at one point I got chastised by her for starting to nod off in the third act. Much as I don't actively dislike the film in the way others this year, such as The Hangover Part II, After Earth and (the worst film I have seen in seven years of reviewing films) the nadir that is Grown Ups 2, if the movie is consistently dull enough to cause me to fall asleep, then it mustn't be anything worth seeing. (And the music is abominable: EHO/Emotional Heartstrings Orchestra 101!)

Diana isn't as bad as it's all cracked up to be. Rainer Klausmann provides some fine instances of cinematography, particularly in conjunction with director Hirschbiegel's use of silent montage in certain scenes. It also contains a strong performance from Naveen Andrews, and the scene involving Brel's Ne Me Quitte Pas is a poignant highlight, though it does tell us more or less how the movie should have been made. Unfortunately, though not as actively loathsome as some films, it has a saccharine script from Stephen Jeffreys, which has terrible characterisation and structure, and the dialogue he has scribed sounds like no one in the world, ever! Also, Naomi Watts, talented as she is, fails to convince in the title role, and the movie drags itself on for far far longer than is necessary. As I said, not actively loathsome, but terribly middle of the road, with all edges sanded off and frightfully dull.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 3.5/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Good good (relaxing Sunday, reading Dragon Ball, WWE Battleground PPV tonight, listening to Billy Idol's Eyes Without A Face)

Diana Trailer

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - Elysium

Directed by: Neil Blomkamp

Produced by: Neil Blomkamp

Bill Block

Simon Kinberg

Sue Baden-Powell

Screenplay by: Neil Blomkamp

Starring: Matt Damon

Jodie Foster

Sharlto Copley

Alice Braga

Diego Luna

Wagner Moura

William Fichtner

Music by: Ryan Amon

Cinematography by: Trent Opaloch

Editing by: Julian Clarke

Lee Smith

Studio(s): Alphacore

Media Rights Capital

QED International

Distributed by: TriStar Pictures

Release date(s): August 9, 2013 (United States)

August 21, 2013 (United Kingdom)

Running time: 109 minutes

Country: United States

Language(s): English

Spanish

Production budget: $115 million

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $263, 655, 806

Right there, starting to get the activity back, if ya ken what a mean, boss? Sorry for the shoddy Edinburgh Scots there, but I've just seen an advertisement for Filth, the new Irvine Welsh adaptation starring James McAvoy and I can safely say it's one of my most anticipated films of the year. It looks like it's going to be an absolute, no-holds-barred screamer. Among others, I'm planning on getting to see Diana, Rush and Blue Jasmine (I haven't reviewed a Woody Allen movie before!), so, with Halloween (article or two in the works there) and Oscar season around the corner, keep your eyes posted!

Today's film up for a look in is Elysium, another of my most anticipated movies of 2013, as it's the sophomore feature from director Neill Blomkamp. Bursting onto the scene with 2009's District 9, an independent science-fiction film with action and intelligence in equal portions that was a surprise hit and bagged four Oscar nominations, including Best Picture. Very much one of the fastest rising film artists, Blomkamp re-unites with many of his District 9 crew for Elysium. BIG PLOT CHUNK AHOY! In 2154, the eponymous location (a reference to the Ancient Greeks' conception of the Elysian Fields as an afterlife) is a space station inhabited by the wealthy who are kept free from disease, while Earth is impoverished, overpopulated and ruled by robots to keep them under control. Matt Damon stars as Max Da Costa, a former car thief on parole attempting to live day by day in the ruins of Los Angeles working in an assembly line for Armadyne Corp., but he is exposed to a lethal dose of radiation. In the midst of this, illegal Earth immigrants are attempting to reach Elysium and Secretary Of Defence Jessica Delacourt (Jodie Foster) enlists the service of mercenary Kruger (Sharlto Copley) to take them out. The President does not appreciate these extra-legal measures, and thus a coup d'etat is conceived by Delacourt and Armadyne's CEO John Carlyle (William Fichtner) to override the Elysium database and make her President. Of course, Max, with his short life expectancy, needs to get to Elysium and that begs the question, will their paths cross? Let's find out. BIG PLOT CHUNK BYPASSED!

Following on from the largest, more or less spoiler-free plot synopsis in the history of this blog (we're all about firsts here), it brings me to what is good about this film. In order to lay out that groundwork, I had to devote some time and space, whereas in the movie it is all dealt with in a decent, relative timeframe. Blomkamp, in the four years since District 9, has obviously devoted a lot of time and attention to detail in creating the world of his picture. Equally devoted to bringing the vision to the screen is production designer Philip Ivey, who has done a tremendous job in making us believe in this future world. Like District 9, but more so as that film was in a contemporary setting, Elysium is full of careful craft and an attention to detail not dissimilar to that seen in a Guillermo del Toro picture. Ivey is a student of science-fiction cinema and Syd Mead, and the respect that he has for those before him, while carving his own designer's path, comes through here. The exosuits created by Weta Workshop are standouts in the picture, the scene involving Damon and his suit (I'll not spoil) is a fine example of people thinking outside the box and harking to an extremis form of artistry, pushing the imagination to the limit. Indeed, the mise-en-scene as a whole is a remarkable achievement, with the makeup and costume design being among the finest I have seen all-year round. The visual effects, headed up primarily by Image Engine (among others), are meticulously designed, complicated and full of little bits and bobs and intricacies that just set a standard above and beyond the norm. Their contribution is another strong addition to the tapestry of this piece, blending seamlessly with the location shooting by Trent Opaloch. He brings the same photographic sensibilities from that film over to this one, the dust and grime in the Earth-bound scenes are captured in all their grot, Opaloch getting across the sense of this world as oppressive and bleak with his excellent digital photography, which, when put together with the beauty in the idyllic gardens of Elysium, make for an extreme contrast. This sense of contrast and class structure in the film is put over by Opaloch consistently high standard of digital photography. The film also has two very talented editors who do a great job of cutting it. Julian Clarke (another District 9 alumni) is teamed with Lee Smith, who has worked with Peter Weir and Chris Nolan on his past five films, so both know a thing or two about how to edit a big action film. Like that previous film, Elysium is an R-rated action movie not afraid to have the audience feel the impact of blood and things spattering into a million different places, but furthermore, the action scenes in the film have a weight and power behind them that most others are lacking, and this is down to the classic Kuleshovian knowledge that the two editors have with timing things just right so that the audience feels them. Finally, on the acting front, while Matt Damon is just about always a reliable lead, once again, the show-stealer is Sharlto Copley. Looking ever more messed-up than he did in the middle of his transformation in District 9, Copley is a genuinely intimidating and menacing screen presence, taking an otherwise secondary character/trope and turning him into a figure of intrigue. His Kruger is the epitome of an onscreen loose cannon, and any time this character is onscreen there is a palpable sense of tension in the air. Sick, twisted and yet intelligently aware of his transgression of moral and personal boundaries, his performance is so convincing that during the course of my research I've found that playing Kruger has put Copley off playing villains: he might not want to play the bad guy, but I'm not going to stop watching them if he does!

Now, I've had a lot to say praiseworthy about Elysium, and I'll certainly give it it's dues where I feel it's deserved and warranted. However (the big however), the fact is is that while it has all these things going for it, Elysium also has a number of problems firmly entrenched in it's design. Interestingly, the problem lies in Neil Blomkamp. Sometimes auteurs can be a double-edged sword, in that while they are what makes the film distinctive and with it's own unique footprint, but on occasion the auteur is not the best judge of their own work. Stephen King made reference to this in his book On Writing regarding the importance of having a 'reader,' someone who can objectively judge your work, in his case his wife and fellow novelist Tabitha King. On District 9, Blomkamp was writing with Terri Tatchell, who's also working on his next picture Chappie, and her absence here is notable. Unfortunately, for all the creativity and effort gone into making the world, Blomkamp, as a sole screenwriter and director, has lost insight of the fact that, at it's core, this film has a base and rather predictable script. Obviously, the shadow of District 9 hangs high over this, but while said film had so much going for it in terms of density and thematic content, this attempts to go for the mawkish high road of sentimentality, takes absolutely nothing with a pinch of salt and contains none of the RoboCop-esque satire and black humour that made previous film so unique. Also, as far as a sophomoric project goes, Blomkamp may have been aiming too high. Indeed, look at what happened to Richard Kelly with Southland Tales, although this is nowhere near the trough in which that picture now resides. Duncan Jones, who released his debut feature Moon in 2009 (along with Blomkamp's film, Star Trek and Avatar were also put out that year) and following that up with Source Code, a simple yet remarkably inventive sci-fi thriller and a modest upward movement. Blomkamp has plenty of years ahead as a filmmaker and does not need to go and make his 2001. All that aside, the script does come across as a poor retread, both of District 9 and x-number of movies across the genre border over the years. Along these lines, I was not fussed on Ryan Amon's score. It's not a particularly bad score, but it really waters down the sort of, post-apocalyptic industrial gruel that we are quite clearly meant to be rolling around in. I'm not against an emotional, heart-rending score, but it over-romanticised and creates a shameless sense of self-mythologising in the movie, and thus qualifies for the EHO (Emotional Heartstrings Orchestra). 

Despite those problems, which I admit probably felt worse off of the sharp intelligence of District 9, whose shadow quite clearly is looming, my conclusion is still positive for Elysium. While it is full of red flags and lacks the intelligence needed to put the movie over fully to me, there is still a genuine artistic drive from everyone involved to try to make the best movie possible. Neil Blomkamp may have been aiming too high and thus lost sight of the ground below, but there is still enough here to convince me of it being a movie of relative merit.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 6.2/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Bored (work is non-existent this week...)

Elysium Trailer

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - Runner, Runner

Directed by: Brad Furman

Produced by: Arnon Milchan

Jennifer Davison Killoran

Leonardo DiCaprio

Michael Shamberg

Stacey Sher

Screenplay by: Brian Koppelman

David Levien

Starring: Justin Timberlake

Gemma Arterton

Anthony Mackie

Ben Affleck

Music by: Christophe Beck

Cinematography by: Mauro Fiore

Editing by: Jeff McEvoy

Studio(s): Regency Enterprises

Appian Way Productions

Double Feature Films

Distributed by: 20th Century Fox

Release date(s): September 27, 2013 (United Kingdom)

October 4, 2013 (United States)

Running time: 91 minutes

Country: United States

Language: English

Production budget: $30 million (movieweb.com)

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $11, 246, 000

So, payday was good, and I wish I could say I went to the depths to try and find you guys another oddball movie to review that might not have been seen as much as, say, Iron Man 3, but the fact is despite scouring the depths of G2 Pictures, in the hope of finding another gem like Transit, the most I came out with (money-wise, anyway) was some more Dragon Ball comics and Planet Hulk. So, in light of that completely irrelevant and pithy update, for more of the some dribble, keep your eyes posted (good grief, that was terrible!).

Today's (and tomorrow's: je suis paresseux...) is Runner, Runner. The film was released in the United Kingdom on the 27th September and I saw it on the 23rd at a press screening at The Movie House, Dublin Road, courtesy of my good friend over at Danland Movies. It seems an unusual release circuit, as it's doing the rounds before being released in the United States, presumably to test the waters as to how well it's going to be received with audiences, as I'm sure the studios are aware of the derisory reviews that the critics have been punching in. Presumably they're waiting for CinemaScore to give their verdict, and they'll decide on their domestic release strategy from there! So, story, story of Runner, Runner goes like this: Richie Furst (Justin Timberlake) is a Princeton student cheated out of his tuition money, and goes to confront the notorious Ivan Block (Ben Affleck) with information about the blackmail, but ends becoming his protege and is sucked into an underworld based off of the financial success of those running online poker scams, all the while being tailed by Agent Shavers (Anthony Mackie) who tries to turn Richie into a double-player for both Block and the Feds. Simple? Good!

To start with the good about Runner, Runner, I'll address the cast. Although by no means are they fully fleshed-out characters (more of which in due time), they've got some good players in to do the job. While it may be implausible to buy Justin Timberlake as a student, if you forget about this and just go with him as the proverbial lead/audience cypher, you'll accept him in that position. Timberlake began venturing into acting a number of years back and when he began his musical hiatus in 2007, he became more prominent on this front, and has proven himself time and again as a solid performer. Anthony Mackie, although not given a great amount of screen time, is convincing in his role as an FBI agent. The real show-stealer (and obviously it's designed as such) is Ben Affleck's Ivan Block. Although a trope of 'charismatic bad guy,' Affleck is more than capable at doing this, and shows another layer of dexterity in his deck. Taking all the best lines and delivering them with a truly barbed edginess, Affleck eats up the part, and while it could be accused to scenery-chewing, the fact is that it's entertaining scenery-chewing and undoubtedly the highlight of the movie, proving that sometimes it's good to be bad. Another praiseworthy aspect of the film is the cinematography by Mauro Fiore. He may have won an Academy Award for Avatar, but this is more along the lines of his work in Training Day. Puerto Rico is depicted as a hot, sweaty place of urbane decadence, and Fiore's lighting has a strong contrast depending on the time. The daytime shoots take in as much of the powerful natural light as possible, showing both the beauty and how overwhelming it can be, the night having an interesting tonal palette, depicting the glitz and glam while also the grimy underworld decadence of this world. Finally, although by no means is it any great bit of work (or a particularly good one for that matter), it is still a relatively watchable flick. Director Brad Furman directs right down the middle, and while not making it anything special, it is still a controlled, decent work. 

Decent it may be, but I did say in due time at one point there, and the clock hath struck three-o-clock, so here come thy crimitisms, as Jed Leland would say (proverbial brownie points). The worst thing about this film is clearly the script by Brian Koppelman and David Levien. It's hard to know where to start because it has to be one of the most derivative and perfunctory pieces of screenwriting to emerge in the past year. I mean, White House Down had a cliched script, but Roland Emmerich and co. know how to have fun with that, with this, at the most you get a temporary rise. Not spoil the film, but I did see a lot of comparisons plot-wise to The Last King Of Scotland, only that this is bereft of the dramatic tension that is built up throughout Kevin McDonald's film by the Peter Morgan/Jeremy Brock writing and the terrific performances by James McAvoy and Forest Whitaker. The characterisation is poor, most especially with that of Gemma Arterton, a perfectly fine actress played a part that describe as a trope would be an overstatement, rather, the better term is 'cardboard cut-out,' because despite her talents, all she's made to do and stand around and look pretty. Finally, there's not much else to say apart from the fact that (as pointed out by my friend at Danland Movies) there is no third act. It's wrapped up quicker than a deus ex machina, and you just think "really?" The film is produced by Leonardo DiCaprio and Arnon Milchan, among others (the film has five credited producers), and you do just wonder do these people really believe that they are putting out a good work, or are they just going at it half-assed? Milchan in particular, who after his 'endeavours' with the Israelis in the sixties/seventies put his name and bucks to films such as The King Of Comedy, Once Upon A Time In America, Brazil, Natural Born Killers and Fight Club, the last great movie he produced, just does not seem to give a damn about the overall quality of his pictures above and beyond whether or not they are borderline releasable.

I wouldn't take the above as outright criticisms of Runner, Runner. Indeed, this is the kind of film that presents itself as a hard movie for me to review because it doesn't agree with me aesthetically. I'm an extremist who doesn't do things half-way. The things that energise me are either movies I really like or really loath, and the same goes for my own art: I put EVERYTHING into my work! It's not that I dislike or particularly like Runner, Runner, it's just one of those down the middle movies that is a decent bit of work, nothing special, nothing atrocious. 

The Thin White Dude' Prognosis - 5.0/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Inbetweenies (as I said, half-way doesn't agree with my aesthetics. Hell, I eschewed my summary because of it!)

Runner, Runner Trailer

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - White House Down

Directed by: Roland Emmerich

Produced by: Roland Emmerich

Bradley J. Fischer

Harald Kloser

James Vanderbilt

Larry Franco

Laeta Kalogridis

Screenplay by: James Vanderbilit

Starring: Channing Tatum

Jamie Foxx

Joey King

James Woods

Maggie Gyllenhaal

Jason Clarke

Richard Jenkins

Music by: Harald Kloser

Thomas Wander

Cinematography by: Anna Foerster

Editing by: Adam Wolfe

Studio(s): Centropolis Entertainment

Mythology Entertainment

Distributed by: Colombia Pictures

Release date(s): June 28, 2013 (United States)

September 13, 2013 (United Kingdom)

Running time: 131 minutes

Country: United States

Language: English

Production budget: $150 million

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $185, 003, 784

It's not that I'm continuing down the line of the perennial stop-start routine of busting out a few reviews every now and then, it's just that it's pretty hard to follow something like my review for Grown Ups 2. That stuff about rolling around naked in a landfill was good, even by my usual, unconstructed rambling standards. Anywho, along with this, I have guaranteed reviews in the pipeline for Runner Runner, Elysium (I've finally seen it!) and either this month or next (depending how I feel) Stoker, Sanitarium and The Lords Of Salem. I might save those three for next month, being horror movies and Halloween 'n all. Maybe I'll put out a guide to Alternative Halloween Movies... and then I'll remember I did that last year so I'll have to have some miserable excuse to publish a new list, or else I'll just have to reprint the same one. So, for all the latest in movie-watching madness, keep your eyes posted!

So, here we have White House Down, a film which got some brilliant accidentally-on-purpose publicity on account of the two stars, Channing Tatum and Jamie Foxx, doing the Jimmy Kimmel sketch, (I Wanna) Channing All Over Your Tatum. Genius marketing or not, I would have tried to see it anyway, not just because I like the stars (Tatum won Best Lead Actor from myself last year for Magic Mike), but also because the director, Roland Emmerich, has always been somewhat of a guilty pleasure. Right up until 2000's The Patriot, Emmerich made some highly entertaining blockbuster films which delivered more than enough bang for their buck, the best of these being the Jean-Claude Van Damme/Dolph Lundgren action flick Universal Solider. However, since The Day After Tomorrow (a singularly awful movie that strangely spotlights of all places in my home country Banbridge), he's made a spat of highly ambitious yet outright dull pictures that in terms of quality fail to match up to the scope of the central concept. Here, Emmerich is back in rather more familiar action territory, Tatum playing John Cale, a Capitol Police officer who takes his daughter Emily (Joey King) to the White House for a tour while he has a job interview for the Secret Service. The interview is conducted by former college acquaintance Carol Finnerty (Maggie Gyllenhaal), who believes him unfit for the job. His skills are put to the test when after Jamie Foxx's President Sawyer announces a controversial peace treaty between allied countries to remove military forces from the Middle East, the White House is taken over by a group of mercenaries with intent to extort from the Federal Reserve, to access NORAD, and to assassinate the President. Got it?

To start with what's good here, the fact is that this is a return to form for Emmerich. I mean, don't get me wrong, some of his action epics such as The Patriot are good movies, but he's been doing that same schtick for well over a decade, and it's nice to see a return to outright, balls-to-the-wall nonsense. It's a simple premise, it's not particularly inventive or well-written (more of which later), but the fact is is that it works! Emmerich is one of the few filmmakers working in Hollywood that can take this sort of material and turn it into genuinely entertaining material, and only Emmerich could manage to convince us in the legitimacy (or rather, absurdity) of a car chase on the White House lawn. I've long been a Roland Emmerich apologist and it's no secret that one of my genre weaknesses as a reviewer is those 1980s-early 1990s action films that don't make a whole lot of sense but feature fights, chases and things that blow up, and both come well together here. I know it's not a work of art by any means, but I'd be a liar if I said I didn't have a whale of a time with this movie. Also helping the movie is the fact overall it is well-cast. Even if they are in smaller, less well-fleshed out roles, Richard Jenkins, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Jason Clarke (very busy, of late) are always a pleasure to see. James Woods does a great job of portraying the inner emotional conflict of Martin Walker, the head of the Presidential Detail. Also a standout is Joey King, who has emerged over the past couple of years as one of the US' most promising child actors. After a bit part in The Dark Knight Rises and a voice role in Oz The Great And Powerful, she has progressed with finesse into a major supporting part. As Emily, King gets across all of the daddy issues and the angst of young adolescence, while also proving herself not just as a competent performer, but a confident one at that. The highlight in the acting terms though is the rapport and chemistry between Tatum and Foxx. Although in many ways Tatum is the lead and Foxx the supporting act, both are equally important on the acting front in putting the movie over to audiences. As I'm sure anyone who follows this blog is aware, I'm more than convinced of Tatum's lead star quality, and that I see him in the same vein of a Brando of old, a quality which he puts on display here, making a character that could have been a dullard amusing and engaging. Foxx too, more versatile than he's ever given credit, last seen comfortably wielding guns in Django Unchained, is an entertaining screen presence as he fumbles around, making decisions about the military yet seemingly unable to handle a gun. Foxx gives the character enough complexity so that it's not a Republican-painted picture of Obama, but instead injected with irony and giving Sawyer this boyish sort-of innocence. As you'd expect from a big $150 million dollar budgeted enterprise, the film is technically proficient. While offering us nothing special, cinematographer Anna Foerster and editor Adam Wolfe do a good job in their respective departments in keeping the ball rolling with the film. Also, the film's production design, special effects and the stunt departments work in great cohesion in helping to deliver the film's success. This is a movie filled to the brim with big explosions, action scenes et al, and if you go in with that expectation in mind, you won't be disappointed. Just to flag up another critic briefly, Andrew Chan of the Film Critics Circle Of Australia wrote "I am not entirely sure, whether I should be happy or sad that someone got shot or bomb [his grammar, not mine], but such is the manner of how the film is played out." Much as I like Chan and his succinct reviewing, I have to disagree, because I had a great time watching people get blown up and shot!

However, that is not to say White House Down is perfect, or by any means a great movie, because while I admit rather enjoying it, the flaws it contains are nonetheless potent and quite visible through all the pomp and circumstance. The major problem, not too much of an issue but a flaw regardless, is James Vanderbilt's script. Vanderbilt is no slouch in the writing department (he was the scribe behind David Fincher's masterful Zodiac), but even with Tatum, Foxx and company performing this stuff, it's still a frightfully derivative work with an abundance of tropes that would have seen cliched in the late eighties. I'm not going to say what they are, not out of laziness, but because it would take the fun out of you unveiling for yourself the various plot (in)intricacies. We have Lethal Weapon buddy cop interactions, the Die Hard siege format played out, insert precocious child here yadda yadda yadda, in an intensely, militaristic 'Merica movie that then has the gall to say "there's more to life than this." It's fun, but reflexive and satirical in the vein of Robocop (the remake of which is being scribed by Vanderbilt) it ain't. The score, accredited to both Harald Kloser and Thomas Wander (birth name Wanker), is also of this same mould. It didn't strike as much as the script, but the fact is that it too is full of the classic genre composition themes. It's been a while since I've reference them (though I'm sure they've been there in spirit), but the EHO (Emotional Heartstrings Orchestra) plays their tired cliches of times past for today. Simply put!

Don't get me wrong, it's terribly derivative and, quite frankly, astonishing in how uninventive it is, but the fact of the matter is is that I enjoyed White House Down very much. It's a technically proficient picture that delivers with the explosions and action scenes, while the cast as a whole, but especially the leads Tatum and Foxx, hold the movie together and sell us on it. Also, Roland Emmerich is one of the few directors today who could direct such a crazy and absurd action movie that despite all it's faults, is still great fun. Finally, as the only person in the theatre who laughed during The Act Of Killing (still my favourite film of the year), I had no question of morality or politics and just had a whale of a time with White House Down.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 7.4/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Sweet (just taking in life day by day)

White House Down Trailer

'Bonus' Trailer

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - Grown Ups 2

Directed by: Dennis Dugan

Produced by: Adam Sandler

Jack Giarraputo

Screenplay by: Adam Sandler

Tim Herlihy

Fred Wolf

Starring: Adam Sandler

Kevin James

Chris Rock

David Spade

Salma Hayek

Maria Bello

Maya Rudolph

Alexander Ludwig

Nick Swardson

Steve Austin

Taylor Lautner

...

Music by: Rupert Gregson-Williams

Cinematography by: Theo van de Sande

Editing by: Tom Costain

Studio: Happy Madison

Distributed by: Colombia Pictures

Release date(s): July 12, 2013 (United States)

August 9, 2013 (United Kingdom)

Running time: 101 minutes

Country: United States

Language: English

Production budget: $80 million

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $221, 017, 503

Much as I might like to rave in a self-promotional manner about how busy I've been, what movies to expect etc etc, but I think that everyone who's looking in at this one perhaps knows what to expect. Hey, I might surprise you and Grown Ups 2 might turn out to be a comedic masterpiece in the vein of Sons Of The Desert, City Lights, The Naked Gun, Withnail & I and Toy Story 3 (BLASPHEMER!). I ain't even gonna lie, I'm finding it hard to hold back on the sheer wattage that is just emerging from my pores, as though I'm gonna turn out like Tetsuo in Otomo's Akira. It's almost as if the medium of reviewing a movie with the power of the typed word is inadequate in fully expressing my feelings. I'm gonna give you a visual image here. There are some of you who will not have seen the movie, but there will be others who get what I'm talking about: Darryl Revok, Ending, Scanners. That's where I'm at!

So, even though I've eschewed my traditional format in the previous paragraph for a State Of My Mind By Way Of Grown Ups 2 Address, here I'm actually going to make some sort of attempt to give the film a bit of context and brief synopsis. Well, there's history here to say the least. Adam Sandler is a guy who had a string of entertaining comedies in the nineties, with films such as Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore and Big Daddy. There have been other good works here and there, but since the beginning of the new millennium, it's hard to detect when exactly, but at some point Sandler went a bit off the rails. Then he made Funny People with Judd Apatow, which deconstructed his onscreen comedic persona and seemed to be his way of saying "I'm done with making shit movies," all of which only seemed to be a harbinger for where he is now, stuck in the worst rut in his career. Stuck is perhaps a bit generous, given that he has been a producer and writer on most of the projects he's been involved in since that film. He followed Funny People with the original Grown Ups film, which I dismissed at the time of it's release as a lazy bit of work which was essentially Sandler and co. going on holiday and calling each other different names for the craic of it, then released it as a movie. I thought this was the artistic nadir until I saw last year Jack And Jill, a film so bad that despite being the first film I saw that year, it managed to remain that way from start to finish, a more than deserving winner of Worst Film of 2012. In the midst of this, there's the anomaly of That's My Boy, a solid and outrageous return to R-rated comedy for Sandler, which, while not perfect by any means, is a movie that is genuinely daring in terms of pushing the boundaries of comedy. However, now we're back to the PG-13, 'family-friendly' territory of Grown Ups 2, although what families these movies are deemed friendly to is another matter altogether. Directed by Dennis Dugan, regular Sandler collaborator, including the nineties heyday, the previous Grown Ups film and Jack And Jill, for which he was made one of my Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse last year, Grown Ups 2 sees Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock and David Spade (no Rob Schneider, best thing in last movie :( ) reprise their roles with their respective wives in tow, as over the course of a single day, a bunch of stuff happens before Sandler and wife Salma Hayek throw a party at their house. If I sound lazy, it's not that I'm actively being so, it's just that I defy anyone to tell me in a detailed, constructed manner what the hell the plot actually is.

As I bang this one out, I'm listening the Guiseppe Verdi's Requiem, and the Dies Irae is about to start up, a harbinger perhaps for the unleashing of the proverbial beast. Before I get there I have to note that there is one thing that made me laugh, as it did with the first one, Chris Rock's relationship with his mother-in-law. Described in the first film as "Idi Amin with a propeller on her head," there are two strong but all too brief gags at the expense of this woman. The first, involving Rock waiting on her going to the toilet so she can't answer the door to get her cable, is silly but funny, and the second, the mother-in-law sitting watching television static in the middle of a montage is outrageous in its absurdity. Apart from these moments, there's nothing to merit. 

"And here we go." - Joker, The Dark Knight

And the Dies Irae is off! Only something of this magnitude could give me the energy of cultural and temporal reflexivity necessary to drive the gears forward in tacking a turgid mess of such magnitude, because Grown Ups 2 is just that. As mentioned, I defy anyone to tell me what exactly the plot of this film is. The only structure of the film is that it seems to be split into two parts. The first part (and the film) opens with a deer pissing all over Sandler's house and his family (here comes the Tuba Mirum), and that pretty much sets the template for everything that's to come. Virtually every gag is jacked up to the maximum level of ridiculousness, and while I'm all and one for comedy, the fact of the matter is that they don't even bother playing up to this and are in fact deadly serious about being funny, if you catch my drift. In this first segment, it comes across as a badly patched together series of sketches, none of which are funny, begging once again the question "With all this talent, why hasn't anyone caught onto the fact that this shit ain't funny?" Oh yeah, answer: Because they're making wackloads of cash! Gordon Gecko might have said "Greed is good," but I don't think Michael Douglas will ever see Grown Ups 2. The second part is an eighties-themed party (woops, spoiler, huh, huh, huh), and it's one of those parties where despite the fact I was born in the nineties, I'm culturally astute enough to get that one's dressed as Prince, the other Meat Loaf, Sandler Springsteen etc., yet they still feel the need to say "Hey, nice Terminator outfit," and as such comments like that only conjure the inimitable Bill Hicks in my head going "Shut the fuck up." But it doesn't STFU, it just goes on and on and on and on and on, and not like Don't Stop Believin', but goes on like a perpetual Chant Of The Ever Circling Skeletal Family (bonus points if you get that without Wikipedia), all wielding mallets smashing my head for the entirety of the film's running time. Well, that would be generous, because I reckon that some of the feelings I got from this film are akin to post-traumatic stress and shell-shock. I love the period of culture they are referencing, but no amount of Frankie, New Order and (I think I saw someone in a) Devo (costume) are going to save this monstrosity. Neither are the likes of Stone Cold Steve Austin, one of the greatest professional wrestlers of all time, Steve Buscemi, Andy Samberg, Jon Lovitz (a highly underrated comedic talent), Shaq, Taylor Lautner, all of whom are thrown in to play off their respective personae, but don't seem to have any appropriate place in the scheme of things. Speaking of playing off ones persona, the same could be said for the primaries, if they were written or acted as though their characters actually had any semblance of a personality. Sandler knows fine rightly that he's being lazy and seems content to rub it in everyone's face, while James is obviously more than happy playing a part of someone who burps, sneezes and farts consecutively (don't know, don't remember, don't care), but Rock and Spade seem bored to tears. It's a sad state of affairs when Rob Schneider can't appear in the film due to 'scheduling conflicts,' and it'll be one of those cases where when they are all old and retired that they admit "you know what, this really sucked." The budget of the film was $80 million, an absurd figure probably about fifty times or more larger than the budget of Rita, Sue And Bob Too, the raucous Alan Clarke comedy from 1987 ("Thatcher's Britain With Her Knickers Down"), which is uproariously funny and something like this monstrosity can't hold a candle. It is phantasmagoric just how bad this film is, and take into account that this comes from the same bad breed as Grown Ups and Jack And Jill, yet makes them seem sooooooooooooo much better! Phantasmagoric is perhaps the wrong word, because it implies something on genuine fascination, whereas it would be far more interesting spending one hundred minutes rolling around naked in a landfill. Much as I'd like to discuss each aspect constructively in thorough detail (Rupert Gregson-Williams' terrible scores strike again!), I'm losing the genuine power for words on this one, so I'll just leave you with another image: Tissue paper, clean, soggy garbage water: that image + first para Revok + Verdi's Requiem = Grown Ups 2 review.

These things being said, I perhaps have only touched upon the precipice of just how bad this movie is. I'm sure there are critics out there who have written far more eloquent and wonderful pieces on just how rubbish this is. I've had to go back through my archive to decide just how bad this is. I've walked into numerous Worst Films, such as Deja Vu, Prom Night, Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen, Vampires Suck, Barbarossa: Siege Lord and last year's Jack & Jill. Each of those film's are monumentally bad, but I think we may find a new low in Grown Ups 2, which is quite possibly (benefit of the doubt my arse!) the worst movie I have seen in my time of reviewing. I think there will be worse, as it's not completely faultless, but it is among the worst movies I have ever seen. I saw this with my mother and sister, the former leaving about thirty minutes in ("I can't stick this anymore!") and the latter continually mentioning how bad it was. There many things to be said about this, but I'll leave it here. At present I'm reading Irvine Welsh's Maribou Stork Nightmares, a novel that involves three layers of consciousness, as the comatose protagonist attempts to escape from the real world into fantasy. If Grown Ups 2 is a part of the real world, than I, like Roy Strang, will be happy to retreat into delirium. 

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 0.2/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Grizzled and migrainous (thinking too much about this movie has hurt my head. All communication I've had today with humans sounds like something from Retarded Animal Babies)

'Bonus Points' Unlock

Grown Ups 2 Trailer

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Sandler

P.S. Blogger's screwed this up, but you get the above sentiment!

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - What Maisie Knew

Directed by: Scott McGehee

David Siegel

Produced by: William Teitler

Charles Weinstock

Daniela Taplin Lundberg

Daniel Crown

Screenplay by: Nancy Doyne

Carroll Cartwright

Based on: What Maisie Knew by Henry James

Starring: Onata Aprile

Julianne Moore

Alexander Skarsgard

Joanna Vanderham

Steve Coogan

Music by: Nick Urata

Cinematography by: Giles Nuttgens

Editing by: Madeline Gavin

Studio: Red Crown Productions

Distributed by: Millennium Entertainment

Release date(s): September 7, 2012 (Toronto International Film Festival)

May 3, 2013 (United States)

August 23, 2013 (United Kingdom)

Running time: 99 minutes

Country: United States

Language: English

Production budget: $6 million

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $1, 066, 471 (domestic gross only)

Aloha, there, TTWD here, as per usual, shooting from the hip, yadda, yadda, yadda. The movie watching has started to pick itself up again and I can confirm for certain that reviews for Grown Ups 2 and White House Down will coming up soon enough. Anyone who follows this blog knows my feelings on the first Grown Ups and the recent output of one Adam Sandler, and I would say you're not going to get a rant, but those would be famous last words. Also, with regards to White House Down, I am a fan of Roland Emmerich, but his recent output (like much of his back catalogue) has been a bit of a mixed bag, so I'll leave that one up in the air until the time of the review. Because of the lack of output in August, I've decided to compile my work for August and September into one 'Review Of The Month,' and on a side note, Ian Fleming's Casino Royale is a terrific read and I'd recommend you all give it a go, especially if you're into the recent Daniel Craig-led Bond films. So, for all the latest in movies, and the odd off-topic observation, keep your eyes posted!

Today's film up for analysis is What Maisie Knew, an adaptation of the 1897 Henry James novel of the same name, updated to a contemporary setting of present-day New York. I use contemporary because I feel we are well past the age referred to as 'modern,' and that it is an antiquated term used rather lazily by just about everyone to describe the world we live in. Anywho, me and Monsieur James have a bit of history, given that I had to read his 1898 novella The Turn Of The Screw, which, although the source for Jack Clayton's 1961 The Innocents, I found to be frightfully dull and in terms of nineteenth-century gothic fiction does not hold a candle to the likes of Sheridan Le Fanu or Edgar Allan Poe. However, Henry James has long since started turning over in his grave, so my hope going in was that his lifeless prose did not translate in adaptation over the course of one hundred and fifteen years. In What Maisie Knew, the titular child protagonist (Onata Aprile), is witness to the disintegration of the marriage of her parents, rock star mother Susanna (Julianne Moore) and art dealer Beale (Steve Coogan), and their relationship(s) with their new partners Lincoln (Alexander Skarsgard) and Margo (Joanna Vanderham). Got it? Good! Let's go!

Starting with the good about What Maisie Knew, I must say that it is an excellently cast film, and certainly the best ensemble of a film I have seen so far this year. The cast as a whole is top-notch. In the supporting roles, we have a strong level of three-dimensional qualities in all of the adults. Julianne Moore is reliable as ever, at moments tender and at other volatile and outright vicious, and Steve Coogan comes across well as both a charming rogue and someone who is quite clearly an unfit father. The younger partners, Alexander Skarsgard and Joanna Vanderham, are also convincing and believable in their parts. Skarsgard's character could have come across as too sappy, but he is never anything but genuine in his role as nice guy Lincoln. Vanderham too, in her debut feature, is a pleasant surprise with her underlying strength and understanding of the character. The real revelation, and the true heart and soul of the picture, however, is Onata Aprile in the eponymous part of Maisie. Not dissimilar to the work we saw last year from Quvenzhane Wallis in Beasts Of The Southern Wild, Aprile seems to possess this sort of innate intelligence beyond her years, comprehending the whole scheme of things and following appropriately her character's story arc. Never anything less than cute and sympathetic, Aprile's precocious innocence is a wholly endearing quality, especially given the underhanded machinations of her parents. Also, there is something to be said in a casting process about selecting a face, for Aprile's features, which dominates much of the posters in the film's marketing campaign, though on the outside represent a lovely-looking child, hint inside at the inner trauma that the parents are putting her through. My compadre on BBC Radio Five Live Dr. K described the film as a masterclass in acting, and while I wholeheartedly agree, it is Aprile's central performance that sells the picture as a whole. Although the cast is the large selling point of the movie in terms of it's qualities, there are certain other aspects which contribute to the overall tapestry of the picture. As you've perhaps gathered from how I've written about the three-dimensionality of the characters, the script is a uniformly dense, solid piece of work from which the actors derive the core of their parts. Writers Nancy Doyne and Carroll Cartwright have crafted this work from the ground, starting with a tight, narratively appropriate plot structure. In this way, although a script is sometimes by default segmented, here it flows seamlessly from scene to scene as blood along the body's pulsing veins. Also, the implications the structure has on the characters that inhabit it is of importance. As the plot develops, and we, like Maisie, realise that her parents are not necessarily up to scratch in the responsibility of caring for a child, there forms a sort-of surrogate family that surrounds Maisie that is both highly comforting and strangely disturbing at the same time. Also, the dialogue of the film is played for the most part just right down the middle, Doyne and Cartwright using neutral language bereft of the usual melodramatic nonsense and which, like most human conversations, is up in the air for one's own interpretation. The film was shot beautifully by Gilles Nuttgens, a cinematographer most famous for his collaborations with Deepa Mehta and, er, Battlefield Earth. Thankfully, What Maisie Knew contains none of the dutch angle nonsense of said film, and is instead shot with the wise modesty of a Sven Nykvist naturalism. There is a wonderfully serene quality to the child's-eye view in the lighting of the picture, the filters giving it a bright hue that suggests the lead character, like us, being overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of Manhattan. It's a subtle but important aspect of the film key to our understanding the bigger picture. Finally, directors Scott McGehee and David Siegel ensure that the film does not lapse into banality. Usually this is the type of film adaptation that could be incredibly self-indulgent and self-important, but the two manage to extinguish this for the most part, and What Maisie Knew is definitely one of the freshest and most genuinely interesting dramas I have seen over the past few years.

Now, while I thought What Maisie Knew was a great film that I liked very much and there might not be much to criticise negatively, there are nevertheless certain elements which did not go down well with me, especially given the context of their place in an otherwise great film. As I've said, I loved the cinematography and how the lighting helps depict the child's-eye perspective. However, the way that this interacts with some of the editing by Madeline Gavin, who, although obviously under direction from above, has injected the film with some slow-motion elements. Perhaps there's also high-speed photography involved, but there's a particular example in the film where things slow down and I became automatically aware that something 'dramatic' was going to happen. If it wasn't flagged up to me in such a gimmicky way, I would have found it interesting, but instead it undercuts the whole sequence. Although not often enough to detract from the whole movie, What Maisie Knew does have moments of wholly unnecessary gimmickry which wave at my like a big red flag.

What Maisie Knew has moments of gimmickry that clash and grate with the rest of the picture, waving out at me like a big red flag and undercutting the whole sequences in which they involved. Thankfully these moments are few and far between, because What Maisie Knew is an intelligent drama. It is a masterclass in acting, for Julianne Moore, Steve Coogan, Alexander Skarsgard, Joanna Vanderham, but most especially Onata Aprile. I don't mean this as a disservice to her abilities, but she does for this film what Quvenzhane Wallis did last year for Beasts Of The Southern Wild, holding the whole film upon her shoulders. It's also a tightly scripted piece, the structure and the way the plot deconstructs 'family' dynamics is very interesting, and the majestic cinematography does much to put over the film's concept of the child's-eye perspective. Also, for the most part, directors McGehee and Siegel keep control of all the tangible elements, delivering a near uniformly solid movie. Finally, worth noting is the fact that it is a PG-rated movie, and proof that you don't need to push any of the swearing, sex, drugs and blood and guts buttons of the BBFC to put out a well-thought out, well-crafted movie.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 8.2/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Cool (although I'm at the Scout Hall later, nice to have a day off and play some GTA 5!

What Maisie Knew Trailer

The Thin White Dude's Reviews - The Heat

Directed by: Paul Feig

Produced by: Peter Chernin

Jenno Topping

Screenplay by: Katie Dippold

Starring: Sandra Bullock

Melissa McCarthy

Music by: Michael Andrews

Cinematography by: Robert Yeoman

Editing by: Brent White

Bellah Mae

Jay Deuby

Studio(s): Chernin Entertainment

Dune Entertainment

Distributed by: 20th Century Fox

Release date(s): June 28, 2013 (United States)

July 31, 2013 (United Kingdom)

Running time: 117 minutes

Country: United States

Language: English

Production budget: $43 million

Box-office revenue (as of publication): $218, 471, 431

Yep, it's one of my perennial and perfunctory statements about my status as an ever-returning film critic. If it seems like I've been neglecting my work in this department, well, it's because I have. In the past few weeks, I've worked security at the Creamfields, Electric Picnic and Bestival music festivals, so it's like I've been on bloody tour, and anytime I was at home, it was a case of (as the French say) "Je suis fatigant." Speaking of home, the only time I have seen movies recently has been on McCready Family Values outings, as along with The Heat, I have seen What Maisie Knew, and tonight I have the dubious honour of taking my mother and sister to see Grown Ups 2. Much as I try to be objective on this one, I just have Ozzy's voice on Black Sabbath's God Is Dead? going on about rising "up from my tomb into impending doom..." So, for those wishing to observe the gradual push towards a consistent pace of reviewing movies, while finding out my, oh my - (SLAPS SELF ON WRIST: George Takei, registered trademark!), opines on whatever falls under my gaze, keep your eyes posted!

Today's film up for dissection is The Heat, an action-comedy in the vein of the now-vintage 1980s buddy films in all their various machinations such as Lethal Weapon (which, incidentally, is a lot darker than people remember it being),  48 Hrs., Beverly Hills Cop, Turner & Hooch et al. The origins of this subgenre of movies involved two character who are polar opposites can be traced back to the great Laurel And Hardy (a shout-out to the boys at Lucky Dog Theatre Productions, who I had the pleasure of meeting while working backstage at Pig's Big Ballroom at Bestival). This particular variation came from screenwriter Katie Dippold's intention to write female characters as the two leads. Directed by Paul Feig, who has previous experience female casts in Bridesmaids, The Heat stars Sandra Bullock and Bridesmaids star (and Oscar nominee) Melissa McCarthy as FBI Special Agent Sarah Ashburn and Boston Detective Shannon Mullins respectively, who are forced to work together to take down a mobster. Comprende?

Starting with the good about The Heat, the best thing going for it is that it is an excellently cast movie with regards to the two leads. Bullock and McCarthy have a great rapport and superb screen chemistry. It's not particular inventive casting (Bullock and McCarthy are proven commodities in their parts as overexcitable/neurotic schtick and brash, loud/foul-mouthed brute), but the fact that the two manage to gel together and deliver their lines at a flawless pace is a commendable thing indeed. It's a fast script, and there are so many times that the two leads, who spend much of the film bickering, really insult and bite into each other, the only thing being in common is that neither is fazed by the other, which only seems to spur them on even more. McCarthy is quite a formidable presence when she's getting stuck in, and Bullock just takes it on the chin. If there's one reason you should see The Heat, it's to see Bullock and McCarthy as an onscreen duo. The film, as mentioned, is directed by Paul Feig, who made Bridesmaids, a very fine comedy from a couple of years ago, for which McCarthy was nominated for an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress. Once again, he understands that the strengths of his cast and wisely leaves them to their devices, while hiding their weaknesses and accentuating their positives. While Feig may never get the reputation of an auteur (unless pseudo-feminists adopt him into their sistren), he most definitely knows how to get the best out of his cast, as nobody comes off looking particular the worse for wear. Finally, while not perfect (more of which...), Dippold's script has some real zingers, the scenes that don't involve expository details and just have Bullock and McCarthy shooting from the hip are often uproariously funny. It is at these moments, which are not few and far between, that The Heat is at it's best.

(...in due time) That's not an addendum, but rather a continuum, for although I liked The Heat and found it oftentimes very funny, one cannot fail to recognise it's fundamental flaws, which lie in the double-edged sword of Dippold's script. Some critics have overanalysed the feminist qualities of the film, in that it's an action-comedy with two females in the lead, yadda, yadda, yadda, but that doesn't change the fact that the plot itself is entirely derivative and predictable. It consists of just about every trope and cliche that emerges from the buddy cop film genre, and, frankly, you can put lipstick on a pig, but it is still a pig. Furthermore, like Feig's previous Bridesmaids, it's too long (about twenty minutes), and the end of second act 'dramatic tension' interlude does nothing to add to the film, especially when the tension is more or less non-existent and the outcome pre-determined. I was listening to a BBC Radio Five Live review of the film with James King, whose opening line that the film was "simultaneously both incredibly familiar and refreshingly different," and I think that is as good a summary of the film as any. 

Not to take away from my own work (it'd be an act of gross false modesty to do), but it is kinda hard to look at the film any other way than King laid it out. It certainly has it's problems in a script which does not really have a modicum of originality to it and like Paul Feig's previous movie it's twenty minutes too long, but hey, I've gotta say that overall I came out of The Heat mostly satisfied. Paul Feig, while he's never gonna be recognised as an auteur, understands the positives of the people he's working with, and lets Bullock and McCarthy take appropriate centre stage. Dippold's script, while problematic, is at it's best while the two leads, who have a fantastic amount of chemistry to the point that I probably think the film is better than it is, are just left to their own bickering devices. Underneath the surface material, there might not be much there, but the surface material is entertaining enough to convince to believe in the illusion.

The Thin White Dude's Prognosis - 6.3/10

The Thin White Dude's Self-Diagnosis - Relaxed (just happy to have a bit of time off work and chill out)

The Heat Trailer